Touchstones

It's been a long time since I've posted. More than 2 years. I'm changing -- been doing some soul-searching. You see, after my mother passed away, so did a part of me. My mother was my "touchstone". If you don't know what I mean, watch "Terms of Endearment" - right before Emma dies. Better yet, I'll save you some time and tears. A touchstone refers to a person who knows everything about you...where you came from, your history, and memories you've shared. It's someone who knows everything about you. I used to be funny and have lots to say on a variety of different topics. If you don't believe me, just ask my family and friends. I was incredibly entertaining! Somehow, I've become quieter and introspective. But there are two people who can bring out the "old" me...my best friend and my son.

My best friend has been there for the past 48 years. You want to talk history -- she knows where all the skeletons are -- starting from pre-school (if you can have skeletons in pre-school...) We might not see each other for a year at a time but when we get together, we sit for hours in the coffee shop and laugh non-stop. It's like a one-upmanship (if there is such a word); and frankly, I couldn't tell you who does a better job. I just know, we are both at our comedic best. Whether it's fashion, TV shows or family -- no matter how sacred it is (excluding religion which is definitely a no-no), it's up for grabs.

As for my son, he's definitely shares his grandmother's sense of humor! And boy, do we let the banter fly. We're both ADHD (undiagnosed) but you can tell by our disjointed conversations that it's there -- and the apple certainly doesn't fall far from the tree! Our talk seems to happen in parallel universes, and yet, we both know what the other is saying. He makes me laugh until I cry. (Frankly, this can be a bit disconcerting, particularly when I'm driving). This, from the boy who used to just make me cry!!

We live in a different part of the world now (okay -- we're still in the U.S. but it looks and feels like a different part of the world) and social mores just aren't his thing -- never have been. Even though we live in a society that everyone marches to the beat of a different drummer, his beat is just beyond anything I've experienced. If I said he was Bohemian, that would be an understatement.

He's not afraid to make social commentary and does so with such a bite that you'd swear he was Methuselah. To quote him, "everyone wants to conform to non-conformity". Who comes up with this stuff? More power to him -- I think it's brilliant! He reminds me of me (well, with much more ferocity, but I attribute that to the fact that he's a male) -- and if he wanted to, I swear he could do stand-up. His rants (and they are definitely rants) are crazy, fun, spontaneous and most of all, remind me of my mother. She would be proud of his outspokenness and quick wit! My mom used to say "when you're dead, you're dead"...I disagree -- you may be gone physically but you continue to live on through the part that you touched...that touchstone that never dies. My mother may have passed but she lives on in my son. And although she's been dead for nearly four years, I can still hear her voice as she looks down from Heaven and says, "That's my boy!"